My Life With Crazy
A Place For Adult Children of Borderline Mothers to Share and Heal
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pam said:   October 9, 2013 9:17 am PST
hello, first I would like to say how much everyone of your stories resonates with me. my mother was never dx with bpd and has been passed for 20 years but she had all of the signs and symptoms. the memory of her actions, hate in her eyes, her twisted sadistic face and voice live with me still. she was definitely crazy and I have forgiven her. my biggest problem was with my father who was also an abused victim but also my mother's greatest advocate. he justified all of the mental, emotional, and physical abuse... after hiding or running out of the house, he would return and give her what she wanted.... admonishing us kids for things we never did and forcing us to apologize, forcing us to clean up the glass and sticky mess, telling us we were indeed bad. this was his way to appease her and get her off his back and in a sick way he thought he was helping us.... to this day, my father denies anything happened. my sister who was abused the worse lives in this false bubble while my brother and I have been outcasted as liars.

Lisa Nash said:   August 7, 2013 6:18 am PST
Don't feel a need to share my story, but do feel a need to say thanks for making this space for people to share and heal. Also, I want to say that cutting off relations with my mother almist nine years ago was the best thing I have ever done. In this time I have healed greatly, and found a marriage partner who, although traumatized himself, is able to offer the consistent loving support I need to be the whole person I long to be. I work with trauma survivors, and feel it is important for us to recognize that the kind of early trauma created by being the kid of a parent with the virulently unhealed trauma of BPD leaves profound dyfunctional habits in the unconscious body as well as the conscious mind or ego. It is difficult to experience and learn to trust more pleasurable alternatives as long as our deep bodies continue to be re-stimulated by contact with a mother who remains entrapped within the old destructive patterns. Cutting off relationship with one's mother is painful, but giving one's own life away to the trauma one inherited is worse. Sometimes ending a sick relationship is the most loving thing to do. I offer love and hope for those who seek healing in the face of such grave challenges. We can do it, fir ourselves, each other, and the generations coming after us.

Holly Dexter said:   July 26, 2013 12:40 pm PST
Here is an example of how children like us think. When I turned 40 I decided I had given her those 40 years and the next 40 were mine. I bought a house hundreds of miles away got a job and while I waited to sell my house she died. I did not move..... everyone knew why. But, when asked "aren't you a little relieved?". I answered "No, at least when she was alive I knew where she was.". Sadly, that is the level of terror BPD's can and do, inflict on their children. My heart is with everyone of you, and here is a BIG HUG. Holly D.

Robyn Bumbara said:   July 13, 2013 10:22 pm PST
I KNOW my mom is borderline. I am 50 years old and it is still poisoning my life. I just want to get off the roller coaster and have the life I want. She has sucked the joy out of too much of my life, and continues to do so.

Cas said:   May 26, 2013 8:05 pm PST
Wow - so much of what everyone wrote resonated with me! It has taken me years (and lots of $ on therapy) to unravel the mystery that is my mom - that is, that she's got BPD. I'd like to find a mother's day card as follows: Front of card: "You are my Mother." Inside of card: "Happy Mother's Day!" ;-)

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